my dog is "special"

WE TODD DID. if ya don't get it, say it out loud to yourself, slowly.

my dog sammy is "special" and yes i mean he is jerry's kids special!

in most cases he is a typical juvenile labrador, he fetches, he runs, he bounces, all nonstop for hours on end (personally i think the energizer bunny got a piece of his mom).

but some times i just look at him and think to myself.... "STOOOOOOPID"! take fetching for instance. at first i was worried that he might have vision problems, .....nope! i can whip a ball at him at top speed and he'll frigging latch onto a ball whizzing by his head like a snapping turtle after a fish and almost never misses (and i dont throw slow... i played first base in high school.. if i hit ya with a ball at speed.... broken bones ensue) but throw a ball where he has to chase it.... stooopidty ensues..
so i am standing out front smoking and i decide to throw the ball for the dog... i grab the ball from the ledge on the front of the house, and sammy goes into "matrix mode", he FREEZES in place and lcoks his eyes on the ball.. you can see the concentration.
i toss the ball into the neigbors yard...
scrabble scrabble scrabble..... gallop gallop gallop .... clomp (sound of jaws guillotining shut on the ball).............. WHAAANNGGG!!...... well.. looks like the neighbors gonna have crappy reception on their dish network tonight.

lets try that again...... toss ball again!
scrabble scrabble scrabble scrabble..... gallop gallop gallop......clomp...................THHUUDD!
ok now thats just retarded.... i can get ya maybe... just maybe not seeing and running into a 6 inch round pole with a 2 foot satellite dish...... but holee hell, how do you run into a fricking house.... it's not like it jumped in your way all of a sudden!

is he a clumsy puppy??? nope... fucker goes from standing still to jumping diagonally...BACKWARDS.... OVER A FREAKING 3 foot high WALL... and doesnt so much as look once... land perfectly.

well, once more into the breach...
scrabble scrabble scrabble..... gallop gallop gallop .... CRASH!!

OMFG i'm gonna kill you you damn dog.. you dented the side of my car for gawds sake....

what more need i say...
WE TODD DID!

peace
-dawg