RANT WARNING!!!!!!

for all of you who read my blog, i apologize ahead of time for the following rant. i realize that most of my regualr readers come here for the antics of the mutant, and am truly humbled by the fact that i do in fact have regular readers.
this however is not about the mutant at all.

****profanity and strong language follow DO NOT read aloud to children... please*****

i swera to god, if it weren't illegal, i'd hunt down and fucking skin every single one of these lying retarded sack o shit realtors i have been dealing with over the last few months (my buyers agent excluded)
i wrote recently about how it seems that realtors do not even speak common english.

after months of searching, just in the last month we had found 2 separate homes that we wre interested in, and frankly just about fell in love with both of them.
now i realize as we are looking at budget homes, that there are expected condition issues that will have to be dealt with. i am fine with that

house#1 beautiful little house great condition, something that i caould easily call home.
so we put in an offer, granted it was a low offer to test the market out... and as expected the offer was rejected.. (no biggie.. part of the process)
the chicken shit realtor didn't even bother to call and speak to our agent.. he sent a freaking EMAIL, and not only that, was a fucking dick about things in the email... (resulting in "severe case of ass" about the realtor)

ok ... many fish in the sea and all that... move along to look at other properties.

interim (here is where we saw what these gems of humanity call "need tlc" homes (needs to be freaking condemmned is more like it)

house #2 little bit larger than the first, needs work (some obvious cosmetic stuff) but overall we really like it.. once again, something i could easily call home..
at initial offer it had a renter in it.. selling realtor says, up the earnest money, and we will have the renter out before closing (ok i can go fo that.. dsaves me some serious hassle) offer made, counter offer in, counter-counter offer made.... and BINGO we agree, and sign a purchase contract, contingent on home inspection and appraisal. turns out the owners were already evicting the renters, so they tell us "good news" we can move the closing up if you want to...
i'm thinking .. aweseome... now for the home inspection....

did the home inspection yesterday....... where the hell do i start.... this fucking idiotic asshole of a realtor could have given us a heads up so that i did not waste my time, money, and emotional investment (MAY IT ROT AND FALL OFF YOU PRICK)
ok the roof is rotting and needs to be replaced.. not only that, but the damn think is framed with 1X4's holy crap.. i wouldnt build a damn doghouse with 1x4's let alone a structural roof..
recalled POS (BUSS FUSE) electric panel.. that was actually recalled in the 60's
move to the basement...MOLD... LOTS OF MOLD ductwork is laying on the ground .. on the FREAKING MOLDY ASS GROUND.....

the home inspector and i have a quick (off the records) chat, and do some quick figuring.... to fix this thing would cost almost as much as we offered on the house.... so obviously.. no deal

this is after having our agent say DIRECTLY to the realtor.. "this is intended as a family home, and these folks will be moving in almost immediately after close" and him responding "great i think they will love it"
WHAT KIND OF ASSHOLE suggests that a family with children WILL LOVE living in a home that could a: collapse on top of them, b: burn to the ground due to illegal faulty electricals, or c: kill the inhabitants by injecting toxic mold directly from the basement into the central air sysytem...
apparantely i have found the josef stalin of realtors (just wnats his needs filled and dont care if it KILLS other folks).... ohh yeah.. sat on the toilet and almost ended up in the basement.....

thank god for home inspectors.....
-dawg